i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
