in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
