Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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