i jhust puked up my retainher.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
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