I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
