This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
