Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Randomize
