Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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