Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize