...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
