it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
