dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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