Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
