in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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