Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
