Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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