so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
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