Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Randomize
