Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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