Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
i drank out of a bidet.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
