Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize