I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
