you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize