Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
