My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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