walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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