really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
