There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
i think my cat just said my name.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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