My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
