im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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