Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I want to have your abortion
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
