my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
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