Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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