Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
