If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
