you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
