maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm too high and old for this...
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
