just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
