honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
