bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Randomize
