well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
