my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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