I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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