If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
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