If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
