all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
honey bunches of taint.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
