I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
