Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize