Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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