he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
