So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
