My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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